


the one who wants to love you more

by rated_e



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Childhood Memories, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Family Dinner, First Meetings, Flashbacks, Jealousy, Karaoke, No one listens to Lexa, Octavia gets cut off a lot, Pining, Possessive Behavior, Promises, Rekindled love, School Dances, Selective Obliviousness, Sinclair is Raven's adoptive father, Wedding Planning, Weddings, commitment issues, if that wasn't clear
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-30
Updated: 2016-04-30
Packaged: 2018-06-02 18:09:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6577054
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rated_e/pseuds/rated_e
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Octavia fell in love with her best friend the day she decided to marry someone else.</p><p>AU slightly based off of the movie 'My Best Friend's Wedding'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Promise

**13 Years Earlier**

Octavia was bored. She lay on her bed, staring at her ceiling as if it would give her something to do. Today was supposed to be a fun day for her but they were snowed in, just her luck.

All of her friends were either busy or not answering the phone. Her mother and brother were occupied making dinner, catching up with each other. Bellamy was back home from university for the week since it was currently Winter Break for both of them. The three were planning on going to Bellamy's favorite hometown restaurant, Arkadia, but they were stuck at home and had to change plans.

The brunette suddenly remembered that when Raven—her best friend— was bored, she would find something to read. Her eyes automatically drifted to her brother's copy of "The Iliad" that he gave to her before he went off to college. Their mother would always read it to him when he was younger, it's partially the reason why he's the dorky, humanities major that he is today.

Stuff like that have never really interested Octavia, though. She only has that book because she knows how significant it is to her brother. She'll find something else to read.

"Octavia! Dinner's ready!" her mother's gentle, yet somehow still loud voice called her from the kitchen. Oh, well. At least she had something to do now.

She runs down the stairs and makes her way over to the kitchen. Their kitchen wasn't big, neither was their apartment really. But it was her home and she'd have it no other way. She took her usual seat at their dinner table and greeted her family. They fell into conversation quick and easily, they always did. The three of them could be talking about the most random thing and still have a good time, as long as they were together. They were a family of many words, you could say.

Bellamy was currently fawning over his new girlfriend, Gina. It's a new name for Aurora, but not to Octavia. He had called her three weeks prior, gushing over his new crush. She's just glad he finally made a move because she and Raven made a bet on if Bellamy would actually ask her out or not. Octavia thought he would, Raven thought he wouldn't. Octavia should be receiving twenty dollars pretty soon.

After dinner, Bellamy got up to take a nap and her mother went to watch TV. Octavia decided to join her mother on the couch and grabbed a magazine from the table. Octavia liked the cover because the beautiful woman had a black wedding dress on. It looked like something she'd like to wear if she got married.

"You know anyone who's getting married?" Octavia asked, facing her mother.

"Do you know your classmate Clarke?" Octavia nodded. She and Clarke butt heads a lot, but she was one of her closest friends regardless.

"Her mother's getting married to a Councilman named Marcus. She's asked me to help her find a dress but there's been no luck so far. That magazine's just one of the many. You can keep it if you want."

Octavia shrugged, at least she finally found something to read.

The following week, Bellamy had returned to uni and Octavia was back at school. She was there twenty minutes early, as usual, so she packed her belongings in her locker and went to her homeroom.

She immediately runs to hug her best friend, whom she hadn't seen all break. As soon as they pull apart, Octavia grabs her mother's magazine from inside her book bag.

Raven scoffed. "What, are you getting married?"

Octavia smiles to herself, handing the magazine to Raven. The two were best friends, but Raven never really showed any interest towards boys like Octavia had. She had one boyfriend last year, but it didn't turn out well for either parties.

"I am," Octavia declared in the strongest voice she could pull off.

"What?"

"Well, not now. Not today. But someday."

"Good for you then. I'm never getting married," Raven sits on top of her desk.

"Yes you are," Octavia frowns. "Everyone gets married."

"That's not true at all," Raven made a face. "You watch too many rom-coms. Are your parents married?" 

Octavia bit her lip. The fact that she's never even met her dad answers Raven's question alone.

"Okay, fine. But you still should." Octavia recommends. "I'll be your maid of honor and you can be mine."

"If I had to marry anyone, it would be you."

A blush crept upon Octavia's cheeks. She wasn't even sure if she liked girls that way or not, but she'd marry Raven in a heartbeat. Clarke loved to talk about how the duo were already married. They did everything together, that was her best friend.

It wasn't her dream proposal, but they were only thirteen. She'd take what she could get. Octavia took the girls pinky and met her eyes before she began.

"If neither of us are married by the time we turn twenty-six, promise we'll marry each other?"

Pinky swear.

They never spoke of it again.


	2. Sixteen Years

"A variation on our squid ink risotto. Trace of Mosetto, just to sweeten the stock."

The head chef places a moist lump of black rice in front of her. She raises an eyebrow, but takes a surprisingly large amount and lets it roll over her tongue. It's actually quite nice. She gives the chef a nod.

"I'm writing it up as inventive and confident. Which it very well is. I'll need an extra boat of the ink, or just a salt shaker."

"I'll toss a coin," the chef leaves her to her meal and heads back into the kitchen.

As he leaves, Octavia looks around at the other tables which causes many pairs of eyes to awkwardly glance away. She lets her gaze fall on Monty, who's staring right at her.

She rolls her eyes. "What is it?"

"Doesn't it bother you? Having your ass kissed in public?" Monty taunts her.

"I'm used to it. It lets me know that I'm good at what I'm doing." She pushes the risotto towards him and he instantly grabs his fork.

"Is that what you wanted all along?"

"Did the guy from that newspaper ever call you back?" He ignored her question, mouth full of squid ink. Octavia grimaces at the sight.

"I'll check," she pulls her smartphone out of her pocket and checks her missed calls. She notices a missed call and a voicemail from Raven three hours ago and presses play.

"Hey O, it's Raven. I've been trying to reach you for a while now. It's been forever. I haven't seen you in what, five months? I can't wait for us to talk. I'm in Chicago right now at some hotel called Ritz Carlton.."

Octavia was impressed, Ritz Carlton was a fancy spot for Raven, considering how much she hated places like that.

"Call me whenever you can. I really need to talk to you. It's important. Bye," the call hangs up. Octavia has this look in her eye that Monty's never seen before, but he likes it very much.

"Who called?" he spoke up.

"It was Raven. My best friend Raven. She sounds eager to speak with me." Octavia places her phone back inside of her pocket.

"The mechanic?" he pushes the risotto back in her direction. "Never knew you two had a past."

Octavia raised an eyebrow at this. "Excuse me?"

"I know that look in your eyes," he waves his fork in her face. "Something's up."

She laughs and shakes her head. "Well, junior year of high school we had this one hot month. And, you know me, I got restless.."

Monty nodded, Octavia got restless.

"So I get the nerve to break her heart. I told her about the good looking muscular guy in my biology class who wanted to sleep with me. She gives me this look. Then she told me she knew she could never hold my interest. I felt like shit, couldn't look her in the eyes the rest of that conversation. But she says that what made her emotional is that she was going to lose the best friend she's ever had. When she said that, I knew I felt the same. So, I kissed her and we reverted our friendship back to what it was before."

"Did you two ever hook up again after that?" he asks.

Octavia shook her head. "Almost. There was this one night in Cabo, about five years ago. We stayed in this beautiful house with a bunch of our other friends for the summer. Clarke, Anya, Lexa, Emori. Fuck, when was the last time I spoke to Emori? That's besides the point. We all got really drunk one night and decided to skinny dip in a hot tub together, all Clarke's idea. I think she'd been planning on suggesting it all night. It was probably on purpose, she was really horny that day. But soon everyone went back upstairs to sleep, except for Raven and I. She gave me this look that said just say the word and I'm all yours. I didn't say the word, of course. I went back inside and slept on the couch, too exhausted to even attempt to go upstairs."

"What happened the next morning?

"Nothing. We just went about our day. We never spoke of it again. Kind of a sensitive topic. It's just so crazy, though. For sixteen years, I've known her for sixteen years Mon. We've been together through everything. Every moment we've spent together have been the best moments of my life. She's the constant in my life, she'll always be there."

"Is she still in love with you?"

Octavia takes a sip of her wine before answering. "Maybe, but it doesn't get in the way."

Something she's never said aloud before, Monty understands.

"I remember this one day, back in like, middle school. We were thirteen," Octavia recalled. "My mother gave me a magazine with a wedding gown on it the week before. I showed the magazine to Raven and she laughed at me and told me she'd never marry. I made her swear that if we were both single by the time we turned twenty-six, we'd marry each other."

Octavia laughs at the memory but Monty isn't even smiling. She wonders why.

"We never spoke of it again. I don't know what made me think of that."

"I do," he mumbles.

"Well, what is it?"

"You'll be twenty-six in two weeks. How old is she?"

Oh, shit. It hits her and it hits her hard. She chugs down what remains in her glass of wine, without even looking.

Octavia shook her head in disbelief. "You don't think.."

"Eager. To speak."

"So if I turn her down, we'll never be the same. Dear God, I'm gonna have to kill myself before I call her. I can't live with myself knowing I caused her that pain twice."

 

* * *

  
Octavia paced back and forth in her apartment, knowing Raven was expecting a call soon. She'd already come up with a number of excuses she could use to make turning down Raven easier for the both of them.

"Raven, I have two weeks to live."

"Raven, I'm engaged."

"Raven, I've enrolled in a convent."

It was probably safer to go with the last one.

After ten more minutes of pacing, she grabs her phone and dials Raven's contact.

"Tavia?" a silvery voice answered.

"Hey! It's so great to hear your voice."

"I've missed you, I've been calling for ages!" Octavia could hear a door shut in the background.

"Yeah, well my phone keeps eating my messages. I've tried going to the Apple store but.."

"Look, I need to tell you something."

Octavia gulps, this was going to be tough.

"If you turn me down on this, I don't know what I'll do."

"Rae, I need to tell you something first," Octavia interjects. "Do you remember that one day of school where I showed you my mothers magazine of that bride with this insanely beautiful wedding dress?"

"Of course," she laughs. "I think about that all the time."

She smiled. "Really? It's funny. You told me that you were never gonna get married and that.."

"Well, that sure is ironic now."

Octavia's mouth was suddenly dry. She needed some water. Hell, she needed some wine.

"How, how is that ironic?" Octavia faltered.

"I met someone O, I'm getting married."

The smile is gone and it's suddenly difficult for her to breathe. She's glad this conversation is over the phone and not in person. She couldn't handle Raven being able to see how clearly upset she was at the news.

"What?" 

"I don't think I've felt this way about anyone. She's a senior at Chicago University, she's twenty two. Her dad is some sort of billionaire who owns this Chevrolet company and some cable empire. It's amazing. You know how I feel about rich people and how stuck up they can be," the Latina rambled, completely unaware of how distressing the news is to her best friend.

"Yeah," she finally got her mouth to work.

"They're such great people, O. The salt of the earth. And we're getting married. Next Sunday."

"How long.. how long have you two been engaged?"

"One month."

"What?" an offended, harsh tone took over Octavia's voice. She gets they've both been busy with work, but how do you hide something so big for so long? Especially from your best friend.

"I wanted to surprise you," Raven defended herself. "I wanted to hit you with news you'd never see coming."

"Oh, I definitely didn't see this coming," she chuckled humorlessly.

"See? It worked. Now it's your turn to come. I can't wait for you two to meet."

"Raven.."

"I'll see you soon!" She hangs up the call before Octavia can say anything else.

 

* * *

  
"Listen Tavia. Why can't we just sit down, talk about this, and then you can take a later flight," Monty suggested.

"Where is your sense of emergency? My best friend is ruining her life," Octavia scolded, sitting up in the passengers seat.

"You mean ruining yours?" He corrected.

"Same difference."

"I still don't understand why you can't just catch a later flight and.."

"I'm a very busy girl. I have one week to break up a wedding, and steal the bride. I have no clue how I'm gonna do it. She's loved me for sixteen years! They've known each other for what, five months? I can't lose her Mon, I'm bringing her back home."

She gives him a quick kiss and heads off into the airport.

 

* * *

  
The crowd is full of noise and commotion but all Octavia can focus on is Raven, and how impossible it should be for someone to be that beautiful.

Raven's face lights up when she sees her and the two run into each others arms. They begin laughing crazy at absolutely nothing, their cheeks tight together. Octavia lets her down and kisses her forehead, arms still around her waist.

"Can you believe it? Can you believe this is actually happening?"

"Hardly?" she responds, lost in those breathtaking, brown eyes.

Raven beams and turns around. Octavia follows her gaze to find who she assumes to be the girlfriend. Great.

The girl walking towards them had short, frizzy hair and skin that seems unnaturally pale.

"Tavia, this is Maya," Raven introduced the pair.

At the last moment, she releases Raven and Maya throws her arms around a startled Octavia, pulling her into a tight hug.

"All I've heard from the day I met my Raven was Octavia this, and Octavia that," Maya pulls away from Octavia and meets her eyes. "I've never had a sister."

Octavia brings herself to laugh at her comment. If only she knew.


	3. Mirrors

Maya must've been going over two hundred miles per hour down the freeway. And then there's Raven, relaxing like this shit is normal. Was she taking a nap? Octavia held onto the grab handle for her life.

"I have a monstrous favor to ask you," Maya gives her a nervous look, still speeding through traffic.

"Excuse me?"

"Raven begged for you to be her best woman, but my friend Harper already snatched the spot. Be my maid of honor?" Maya offered.

Octavia blinks. "Shouldn't you ask another friend or a relative or I don't know. Someone you've known longer than thirty minutes?"

Maya glances over, now at eighty miles per hour. It's a bittersweet look.

"If you're going to be my maid of honor, I have one week to make you my new best friend. Since I already know everything about you, including intimate facts I'm disturbed to have heard, but too envious to forget. It's time for you to learn a few things about me."

Octavia forces herself to smile. Keep your friends close, but your enemies even closer.

"Sounds like a plan."

 

* * *

  
Raven's a traitor, Octavia's sure of it. She just had to make her go to try on dresses with Maya.

"I'll be fun, O. You guys need some alone time to get to know each other. You'll be best friends by the time you walk out of there."

Yeah, right.

 

* * *

  
The bridal shop was beautiful. Octavia, Harper, and three other girls—Keenan, Fox, and Roma— were there to help Maya pick out her wedding dress. This should be fun.

"Thanks so much for coming with me to pick out a dress and to try on yours. I think I finally found the right one," Maya called from her dressing room.

All the girls, excluding Harper and Octavia, were wearing teal bridesmaids dresses. The dress was plain, but nice on the eyes. Harper and Octavia on the other hand, had on the same dress, but in dark blue. Maid of honor/best woman advantages? She's not sure.

"I think this one is it," Maya steps out from her dressing room with a stunning white gown on.

It fit her figure well. The v-neck made her breasts stand out, but Octavia's sure no one would complain. Except her father, maybe. It was a long dress, covered with beautiful lace fabric. Her sleeves were transparent, but there were short strips of lace at her wrist and on her shoulders.

"Maya! You look gorgeous, I'm gonna cry," Keenan acknowledged. She wasn't exaggerating. Octavia saw tears strolling down her cheeks as soon as Maya walked out.

"It's amazing, I can't believe you two are finally getting married. It's about time," Roma added, playing with her earrings.

"I hate to take the attention off of the bride and all but, why am I wearing blue?" Octavia spoke up. "I thought bridesmaids were supposed to wear the same thing."

Maya grinned. "You're the maid of honor, Octavia. Plus, you're not comfortable unless you're distinctive."

Only her closest friends knew Octavia secretly liked to stand out. Christ, what else has Raven told her? 

"What else has she told you?"

"You swear you want to get married, but you hate love. You're restless, get bored easily. And you have a short temper."

Well, that's true. "That's why Raven and I were a wrong fit from the start. We're too much alike."

"She said that too."

Octavia sighed. "I need a smoke."

"We're leaving soon. But I need my maid of honors opinion first," she did a quick spin. "How do I look?"

"You look great, ten out of ten," she answered honestly.

 

* * *

  
Octavia sits on a loveseat in her bra and panties, lighting one cigarette from the butt of another. Suddenly, she hears an argument outside the door. It sounds like Maya and Raven, she wants to listen. She considers eavesdropping when she hears a soft knock. The door opens a crack and her dark blue gown comes through it.

"You can come in, shut the door," she called out.

"So, how did you two get along without me?"

Octavia jumps, she was expecting Harper or even Maya to return her dress. She considers covering herself up, but Raven's seen her a lot more naked than that. Raven clearly sensed the hesitation and chuckled to herself. Fuck, she knew her well.

"I mean, we were skinny dipping buddies about five years ago in Mexico. My drunk ass had to drag you up to your room that night because you insisted on sleeping on the couch," she tosses the dress towards Octavia.

"Things are different now." Octavia catches the dress and places it on her loveseat.

Raven looks her in the eyes and nods, a little sadly. Things are different.

"Well, I'll leave with two different thoughts on my mind."

She walks to the door and looks back.

"You're still as beautiful as I remember you."

"What the second?"

Her eyes quickly roamed up and down Octavia's body. "Mirrors."

And she's gone. Octavia turns around to find SIX different views of her uncovered backside. Interesting. A crimson blush crept upon her cheeks as she pulls out her phone and sends a text to Monty.

 **[3:14 - Octavia] Mon?**  
**[3:18 - Monty] What is it?**  
**[3:19 - Octavia] She's toast.**

 

* * *

 

The parking valets wait by their stand as Maya's convertible pulls up. The valet gives Maya her ticket and they walk towards the garage elevators.

"Where are we going again?" Octavia asked.

"My bridal shower," Maya stated.

"I thought those things were supposed to be a surprise."

"No, silly. Those are baby showers and I'm far from pregnant. This shower is where all my friends, family members, and any other close female join together for one common goal. To celebrate my upcoming marriage."

"Speaking of marriage, the honeymoon is where, exactly?" Octavia questions, slamming the elevator button.

"It depends. Raven suggested somewhere like Cabo San Lucas in Mexico. Said the two of you and a couple of other friends went there for summer break. Was it fun?"

An empty elevator arrives and they get in.

"It was great. Beautiful weather, amazing food. The two of us always talk about how we need to go on another trip together soon. Maybe somewhere like Hawaii or Fran.."

"How is she on flights?" Maya cut her off, a curious look in her eye.

"Oh. Well, she's fun to be around at times but is the worst travel buddy possible," Octavia lies. She would always try to sit next to Raven wherever they went, she just needed to get inside Maya's head.

"Really?"

"Takes one woman in a million to put up with her shit. She's a one-woman festival of idiosyncrasy. She packs last minute, asks if we're there after 30 minutes of driving, complains way too much."

Maya pushes the penthouse button. "You sound like you hate her."

"Oh no. It's all out of love. I'm just trying to tell you what you're getting yourself into. You've probably already been introduced to her insane habits like.."

"Smoking in bed? I broke her of that," her content smile was brief. "But the fridge is always left open, she tries to fix everything, her jokes are painfully corny, she insists on doing karaoke when she knows I can't sing for shit. She recites this Edgar Allan Poe poem when she gets nervous, it's unbearable."

"That's a trademark and it's adorable, don't touch it," Octavia folded her arms.

"But she sure can kiss."

Octavia looked uncomfortable as she planted a smile on her face. "It's been forever, I'll take your word on that."

"Can I tell you a secret?" Maya whispered.

Octavia nods but instantly regrets it when Maya slams the emergency stop button.

"I made a list on all of Raven's faults. Everything I can't stand about her, I've had it for the past month. But I'm throwing it away. She's not some sort of balance sheet, she's Raven. And loving her means loving all of her faults."

"Do you get nervous in confined spaces?" Octavia spoke incoherently.

"I admire you for being protective.." Maya admitted.

"I'll rephrase that.."

"But nothing could ever give me one moment's pause about our marriage."

"Do you get hysterical in small, confined spac.."

"Except one. You." 

Octavia stops rambling and steps in front of Maya, expecting a fight. She could take her. Maya's taller than her by what, two inches? That's nothing. Octavia's fought people twice that size (maybe she's exaggerating).

"You'll always be there, Octavia. This perfect being that she's loved for what, ten years?"

"Sixteen," Octavia spoke under her breath, pacing around the elevator.

"What am I gonna do? Be jealous of you for the rest of my life? It's impossible for us to avoid each other," Maya emphasized.

"Of course."

"She'll always talk about you," it sounded like she was venting now.

"That's only natural," Octavia said.

"And the answer was so simple."

"I was gonna predict that."

"You win."

Octavia blinks. "Did I miss something?"

"You're the constant in her life, you'll always be there. She has you on a pedestal. And me in her arms."

 

* * *

 

They arrive at the bridal shower and Octavia is greeted by a purple balloon to the face. God, this room was purple. Purple balloons, purple flowers, purple chairs. Maya leads her to a woman Octavia doesn't recognize with red lipstick and a red dress that reached her knees.

"Octavia, I want you to meet my mother, Becca."

Her mother was beautiful. They had the same black hair, but her mothers hair was longer and way less frizzy.

"Is this Raven's Octavia?" Both girls nodded.

"I'm Becca Vie, and my future daughter-in-law did not do you justice."

Becca takes both of Octavia's hands and looks her warmly in the eyes.

"My husband says you can go out and hang out with him and the rest of the boys, but I advise you not to. There are too many old woman for you to meet. Come on, some of your friends have arrived already. I'll show you to them."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I tried to describe this dress as best as I could: [x.](http://1ycj2r3bavx920ilxq3m8nxc157p.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/09/Photasia_Photography-123.jpg) Lol, how did I do? Hope you enjoyed.


	4. Firecrackers

After a good twenty minutes of greeting old women she'll most likely never see again, Becca directs her to a corner where about seven women in their mid-twenties appear to be devouring a plate of heart shaped cookies. Octavia knows Sinclair made them, he made the same cookies for Raven and Octavia whenever she would stay the night.

She almost has a heart attack when she makes eye contact with Clarke and realizes this was the group of friends Becca was talking about. Octavia has been so occupied with greeting those old women, she'd nearly forgotten all about what Becca had promised.

Clarke almost drops the plate of cookies she had in her hands (which was caught by Anya, always quick, that one) when she ran to embrace Octavia. They held on for what seemed like forever until Clarke let go to grab another cookie. Octavia then greeted Anya, Emori, Lexa, Niylah, Monroe, and Echo. Wow, she had more friends than she thought.

"I feel like I haven't seen you guys in forever," Octavia took a seat next to Monroe and grabbed a cookie for herself.

"That's because you haven't," Anya replied bluntly.

"We haven't all been together as a group since last year in Beijing," Niylah stated.

"I vote for our next trip to be to Bora Bora," Monroe suggested.

"That's what I said!" Emori exclaimed, mouth full of food.

"Emori, can you not speak with your mouth full? I'm trying to eat," Lexa requested.

"Sorry," she swallowed.

"So does this mean that Maya is invited to all of our trips by default now?" Octavia guessed, but there's no point since she already knows the answer.

"It would be rude to not invite her, Octavia," Lexa commented.

"That's not fair," Emori drawled. "I wanted to take Murphy with us to Barcelona but everyone said no."

"Because he's an uptight jerk who none of us like," Niylah reported.

"He's changed!" Emori exclaimed.

"Yeah yeah, you said that last year. Octavia, back to the Maya thing. What, do you not like her?" Anya wondered aloud.

Octavia rolled her eyes, Anya just loved to call people out on their shit. _Especially_ her.

"I don't think they're right for each other." The brunette wasn't lying, she did feel that way. But knowing her friends, they wouldn't let her leave it at that.

"Then who is she right for?"

"I'm sure there are plenty of people out there Maya could be interested in.."

"You know I'm not talking about Maya."

"I think.."

"Surprise!"

The girls turned around to see Raven surrounded by a bunch of middle aged women. Didn't Maya say this wasn't supposed to be a surprise? Was she meant to get her a gift? Who cares. Raven just saved her ass from having yet another heartfelt confession this week.

"I'm gonna bring her over," Octavia notified the group, already walking over to where Raven was.

"We're talking about this later!" Anya called back.

Octavia decided to ignore her comment for now and tapped Raven's shoulder. Raven turned around and Octavia was more than happy to see those familiar brown eyes looking up at hers in relief.

She greeted the ladies Raven was talking to and swiftly pulled her away from the group.

"Thanks for saving me, they would not stop suggesting potential baby names. It was a nightmare," Raven whispered.

"No problem, I have some way more interesting people you need to talk to." Octavia interlocked their arms and practically dragged her to where the girls were.

Raven was nearly as surprised as Octavia was when she saw the group, but her reaction was way less late.

"I can't believe you all made it," Raven kissed Echo's cheek and sat between Anya and Lexa.

"I can't believe you're getting married," Echo admitted. "You know it's not too late to run, right?"  
  
"Thank you for a back-up plan Echo, but I don't think I'll need it," Raven chuckled.

"You're actually going through with this? Do you remember what happened with me and Roan?" Echo recalled. "I loved him, we were engaged for months. And then he left me with no explanation and started dating that chick with those scary, but kind of cool scars on her face."

Raven looked on sympathetically. "I remember. We ate sherbet ice cream and watched Grey's Anatomy reruns for a whole month."

"If you ask me, it was for the best, Echo," Lexa spoke. "Remember the mother-in-law from hell? Clarke, Costia, and I went to visit you and.."

"And she was there and got really drunk and called the three of you dykes. I remember Lexa, I was there," Echo acknowledged. "What she did was horrible but I can assure you Roan is nothing like his mother."

"You speak of him as if the two of you are still together," Octavia wasn't looking at her, but she could hear the eye roll in Anya's bitter voice.

"We're not, I've made peace with that. But I will not make peace with the fact that Maya and Raven are moving too fast," Echo turned to face Raven. "How long have you two known each other again?"

"Echo," Niylah warned.

"It's fine, Niy," Raven reassured. "We've been dating for four months, engaged for one."

"You were engaged after four months? Have you two even been living together?" Echo sounded hostile, a mix between envy and bitterness. Octavia knew it was only out of concern. She felt the exact same way actually, bless Echo's heart for having the guts to say it.

"She's stayed over at my place, I've stayed at hers. We're moving in together after we get married."

"What if.."

"Echo, enough," it was Clarke warning her this time. She didn't need to jump in, though. The look on Lexa's face said it all.

"Fine, I'll stop," Echo threw her hands up in defense. "I'm really happy for you Raven. Even if I do feel like you're making the biggest mistake of your life. If in the nearby future you're in a situation where you need me to boost you up and help you climb out of the bathroom window, I'll be there."

No one was really surprised at her comment, their group was known for being a bunch of firecrackers, waiting to go off.

It was time to hand out the gifts to the brides. Octavia was just glad that Clarke and Emori forgot to bring gifts as well, or else she would've looked like a shit friend. She probably still did look like one. At least she doesn't have to be a shit friend alone.

Fox and Roma bought them a Mrs. and Mrs. Throw Pillow Set. It was a cute idea, Octavia would've thought of that if she actually approved of this wedding. It was worth it to see the look on Lexa's face when she saw she wasn't the only one with that idea.

Anya got them both matching silk robes, Monroe gave a gift basket, Niylah handed Raven a bathing suit for her honeymoon. After gift, and gift, and gift, it was finally over. Octavia had fun, though. She doesn't think she would've came out of there alive if Clarke and the gang hadn't showed up. She would've been even more excited about them telling her they were staying at the same hotel if Anya hadn't insisted on sharing a room with Octavia.

She loved Anya, she did. And she knows that Anya means well. But when Anya wanted to get the truth out of you, you had to surrender before she started to use force. Octavia needed someone a bit more reasonable to confide in. She needed Clarke.


	5. Margarita, Vespa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karaoke and Checkers.

Harper had just finished a surprisingly impressive performance at the karaoke bar they were currently at. She took her seat next to Monroe who was still cheering, like some sort of proud girlfriend. They seemed to be getting along just fine. Octavia made a mental note to tease Monroe about this later.

Octavia was sitting at a table with Raven and Maya. She looked across at Maya, who looked next level terrified.

"I didn't realize this was a karaoke bar," Octavia whispered. 

Maya nodded unconvincingly but kept her mouth shut. She pursed her lips into a hard line, seemingly thinking hard about something.

Octavia signaled for a bronzed, shapely waitress to come over to their table. She wore a purple blouse with skin tight black jeans. "Y'all thirsty?" the waitress asked, a cup full of tips on her tray.

"Margarita," Raven and Octavia answered simultaneously. They both giggled because they know it's not the first time something like that has happened.

"She wants blended no salt," Octavia added.

"She wants it straight up," Raven poked Octavia's nose.

"And you?" the waitress asked, pointing at Maya. Her unexpected voice snapped the inattentive girl out of her reverie.

"Oh. Sorry. I'll take one amstel light, please," Maya's folded hands were resting on the table.

The waitress nods and walks off.

"Alright Rae, I have two words for you," Octavia held back a laugh. Raven nodded, her eyes bright. "Margarita, Vespa."

Raven laughs as the memory kicks in. "Your old Vespa? Me hanging on behind in the rain all night?"

"Until the gas ran out," Octavia reaches a hand out to tuck a string of Raven's hair behind her ear. She hasn't been wearing it in a ponytail lately like she used to. Octavia likes the ponytail better, it gives her a better view of Raven's face.

"Where was that? Florence, huh?" Raven's beaming now. Octavia likes it a lot.

"Firenze," Octavia smirked. Florence had to be one of their best trips. From Monroe getting chased out by security for taking photos in a strictly "no pictures" museum to Emori telling off a group of men who were staring at her deformed hand like hawks. It was truly iconic.

"And they guy with the thing, remember?" 

Octavia bursts out laughing. "Where's my pass?"

"No, the pier is for fishing!" Raven imitated in her best Italian accent.

"French kissing?"

"Fishing! Fishing!"

"I've always loved Florence," Maya spoke up. Octavia's eyes flicker. She almost forgot Maya was there, almost.

"You should take her there for your honeymoon," Octavia proposed. 

"Maybe she will," Maya deadpanned. The waitress returns and sets two margaritas in front of Raven and Octavia and the amstel light in front of Maya. They chorus a thank you and Octavia places a dollar in the tip cup. The waitress sends a playful wink at her and walks off once more.

Octavia takes a long sip of her margarita. "Waitress is hot, don't you think?" Maya asks casually. Octavia nearly spits out her drink.

"What? Um, I didn't pay her mind really," Octavia shrugs, clearing her throat.  

"She was _definitely_ paying you some mind. You should go for it," Maya takes a sip of her beer. "You've been single for what, a year?" Her voice sounded concerned, but Octavia knew the girl was only trying to spite her.

Octavia plasters a friendly smile on her face. "A year and a half, actually. Nothing to be ashamed about. I like the freedom." It was true, Octavia loved the serenity that came with not having to worry about things like petty arguments or heartbreak. She loves being single until she sees things like happy family eating together at a restaurant or a romantic movie where the protagonist gets the girl and all of the good guys live happily ever after. It makes her think about what she's missing out on.

"Good for you Octavia. You shouldn't be pressured into entering a relationship because you feel like you have to," Raven raises her glass and clinks it against Octavia's. "Cheers to that!" Octavia gives her a wistful smile. There was something in Raven's eyes that told Octavia they weren't talking about the same thing.

Raven sets her drink down. "Well, enough of this. We came here to hear you sing, I want to hear you sing," Raven gestures for some slender white woman to hand her the microphone.

"No Raven, give me that," Octavia demands. "She hates singing, you know that."

Raven raises an eyebrow at this but speaks into the microphone anyway.

"Hello everyone. My bride-to-be here is ready to kick some ass — babe, what? It'll be fun, trust me."

"She doesn't want to Raven, leave her alone," Octavia snatches the microphone from Raven, secretly enjoying this.

Octavia dramatically clears her throat. "Ladies, gentlemen, and others. Please give it up for the breathtaking vocal stylings of Ms. Maya Vie!" The crowd erupts in cheers.

Maya shoots a glare her way but excepts the microphone nonetheless. She takes a gulp of her beer before hesitantly standing up. Octavia grins. Good, she was gonna need it.

 _"Summer after high school when we first met,"_ Maya sang in the most pitchy voice Octavia's ever heard, and she's heard the travesty of Echo attempting to sing Adele acapella. She could hear muffled laughter coming from Harper and Monroe at the table beside theirs.

_"We'd make out in your Mustang to Radiohead, and on my 18th birthday we got matching tattoos."_

Octavia couldn't exactly read the look on Raven's face. It looked like a mix of respect and sympathy. The crowd was silent but she's sure she could've heard someone booing a few seconds ago.

Maya tried her best to follow the lyrics, she really did. Bless her soul. About twenty seconds later, she reached the chorus but sounded different than before. She wasn't as nervous or shaky. The crowd definitely noticed. She laughs when she fails to carry the note and the audience begins to clap along.

_"We'd keep all our promises, be us against the world."_

Raven is staring at her longingly because she knows Maya's not perfect but she still tried. She loves her for her and Octavia can't stand the sight.

 

* * *

  
Raven opens the door for Maya as she steps into her cab. Maya grins and kisses her fiance tenderly through the open window. She waves past Raven to Octavia as her taxi drives off.

Octavia comes up behind Raven and slips a hand up onto her shoulder muscle. She starts giving her a massage.

"Should I whistle us a cab?" Octavia offers.

Raven moaned and Octavia would've died happy right there. "Cabs are expensive. My girlfriend's the rich one, remember?"

"Fair enough. Want to get a burger instead?" Octavia suggests, still rubbing her best friends shoulders.

"Now that I can afford," the Latina grinned.

They walked in comfortable silence to the nearest fast food restaurant they could find. Checkers it is then. They both order a Cheese Champ and sat on a nearby staircase.

"Were you surprised when I told you?" Raven asks with her mouth full. It's disgusting but Octavia's way too fond of the girl to say anything.

Octavia answers with a shrug. "A little. A lot. I almost passed out."

Raven laughs. "But you like her, right? I thought you two were getting along until tonight. Forgive her, she can be a bit..."

"Forward?" Raven hums in agreement. "Well, we all have our moments. I like the girl. She can't hold a note to save her life, but she's great."

"That's good to hear," Raven scoots closer to Octavia to allow an elderly woman to walk up the staircase. "I'm glad the two ladies in my life are on good terms."

"I'm not. Imagine if the two of us just straight out, hated each other. We could've gotten our own sitcom," Octavia quipped.

"Would've made great television," Raven joked, taking a mouthful of her burger.

"So, where did you two even meet?" Octavia fakes interest, crossing her legs. "Was it love at first sight? No, let me guess. Something was wrong with her car.."

"Why does everyone think that?" Raven sounded marveled. "Trust me, you are not the first."

"So how did it happen?" Octavia hates herself for asking, but goes along with it.

"We met through a mutual friend. Nothing special."

"Who's the friend?" Octavia listened intently, she was eager to know who she had to kill.

Raven took another bite of her burger. "Bellamy."

What? "What?"

"I was in Michigan about six months ago. Visiting a cousin, nothing special," Raven explained. "I spotted him in a Panera Bread talking to Maya. He introduced us and the rest was history."

Octavia sighed. She wasn't big on kinslaying, but it had to be done.

"I always thought you were the type of person who found that kind of perfection boring. Day after day, year after year.." Octavia crushed a bug with the heel of her boot.

"That's what I thought at first. How can you stand being with someone that perfect? But the closer I watched, the more fault came into focus. Look at karaoke night. She can't sing worth shit, but she was laughing. She had fun. She has plenty of positive traits, Octavia. You just have to get to know her."

"Such as?" she inquired. Her question came out ruder than intended.

Octavia can hardly bear the endearing look on Raven's eyes. "When I hug her, when I kiss her. Even in public. I don't have to let go right away. She lets me hold her as long as I want."

All of the things she would never allow Raven to do. Octavia exhales deeply and takes another bite of her burger. 

Raven rolls her eyes. "You always get like that when it gets sentimental."

Octavia swallows. "I do not."

"Whatever you say."

"Well, when we were.. when you I were.. when, when we were.." She trails off, internally cursing herself for not able to finish her sentence.

"Together?" Raven jumped in to finish her sentence.

Octavia nods. "Well, did I.."

"Yes," Raven answered, voice a little louder than necessary.

Octavia made a face. "Yes what?"

"Yes, you pulled away when I tried to hold you in public." She took another bite. She glances at Octavia's face before turning her attention elsewhere. 

Octavia stands up and throws her wrapper in the trash. "Well, I've changed. I'm not the girl that I once was."

Raven shrugged and took the final bite of her burger. Prove it. "Really? Has there been any relationship over two weeks I haven't heard about?"

"This is not about longevity, Raven. This is about me being comfortable. With yucky love stuff. And I am."

Raven threw her wrapper in the trash can and whistled for a cab, completely ignoring Octavia's confession.


	6. Over A Decade

Octavia was so exhausted by the time she made it back to her room that she nearly ran into Anya on the way to her bed. Or their bed now, considering Octavia's plans for this to be a room for one were clearly not working out. Well, look on the bright side. At least if Anya was planning on having that talk with her, she'd only be half awake to hear it.

"Where have you been all day?" Anya reproached the brunette. "After the bridal shower, everyone came back to their rooms except for you and Monroe."

Octavia set her purse on a nightstand and sat on the bed. "Sorry mom, I went out for karaoke with my friends. I apologize for having fun without your permission."

"Apology not accepted. I told you we were having this talk later," Anya reminded her. The brunette groaned, she really didn't feel like doing this. 

"Trust me, I haven't forgotten. But can this wait until the morning, when I'm fully awake? I've had a really long day." 

"You're not the only one. We have much more important things to discuss, like how our best friend Raven is getting married in five days and she still has no idea you're in love with her," Anya stressed. Octavia could laugh. Anya knew nothing about her situation, she's in no place to give her _any_ advice.

"I'm not talking about this with you," Octavia chucked humorlessly. She kicks off her boots and places them at the foot of the bed.

"Well you need to talk about it with someone because this is a problem, Octavia. You cant't live like this."

"I've been doing it just fine the past sixteen years, I can make it another five days." She pulls off her pants and throws them on the floor. "Like I said, can this wait until later?"

"That's ridiculous. You've been leading her on for years!" Octavia winces at the girls words. 

"You haven't even known us for that long. You know nothing about our friendship," she insists.

"Is ten years not enough for you?" Anya asked incredulously.

"Nope. It's a fifteen year limit, I'm sorry. Try again in five years."

"What, is it Clarke you want to speak with? Because we all know you won't be talking to Raven about this any time soon."

"I was planning on telling her tomorrow," Octavia lied. She's not even sure when she was planning to tell Raven, even though that was the whole point of the trip. She's been a little busy trying to win Raven back over, the truth can wait.

"Were you now? Or were you thinking about it but went against it because you thought it would ruin your friendship. Like you've been doing for, how long again?"

"Oh, very funny." She ripped off her jacket and threw it onto the floor next to her pants.

"Everyone already knows you have feelings for her," Anya announces. "You're not sneaky about it. I'm sure Maya's caught on too. I've seen those glares she throws at your way."

"Then what's the point of telling her if everyone already knows?" Octavia shrugs. "Seems kind of pointless."

"Because Raven deserves the truth. You shouldn't play with people's emotions like that if you don't have intentions for a serious relationship."

"You don't know what my intentions are," her voice cracked. Fuck, she really didn't need to start crying right now.

"What are they, then?" 

Octavia's not sure when she started crying, but she was. Octavia wasn't really a crier. She can count the number of people who have even seen her cry on one hand. She sits on the edge of the bed and wraps her arms around herself tightly, as if she was trying to hold herself together.

"She was in love with me every day for sixteen years, Anya. Me. I can make her happier than Maya ever could." She nearly chokes on a tear towards the end of her sentence.

Anya sighed as she sat next to Octavia on their bed. She wrapped her arms tightly around the girl and kissed her head.

"I shouldn't be crying with this much makeup on," Octavia tried to joke. Anya didn't laugh.

"Tavia?"

"What?" she sniffled.

"Do you really love her, or is this just about winning?"

Octavia swallowed hard before answering. "I love her. I love her and I can't make her happy. I love her and I'll never be good enough for her. You and I both know that she deserves way better than someone who took over a decade to finally realize how she felt."

"She loves you too, you know," Anya informed her. "She's always been in love with you."

"And I've always known, but I have yet to do shit about it. I'm pathetic," she snapped. She was angry. Angry at Anya for making her confront her feelings, but mostly angry at herself for avoiding them.

Anya pulled Octavia from her chest and looked her in the eye. "So do something about it now."

"Yeah, listen to her."

Octavia jumped when she heard the sudden voice and turned around to find Monty leaning on the bathroom door. What the hell?

"Monty, have you been here the whole time?" she angrily wiped her face.

"Anya bet me twenty dollars that she could convince you to tell Raven how you felt way better than I ever could," he pulled a twenty out of his wallet and handed it to an eager Anya.

Confused, Octavia turned to Anya. "Was that whole heartfelt speech just so you could get twenty dollars?"

"No," Anya stuffed the money in her bra. "I meant every word I said. But he showed up while you were still out, so I decided to make things interesting."

"Unbefuckinglievable," Octavia got under her covers and went straight to sleep. Fuck her clothes, fuck her makeup. She was too tired for this shit.

 

* * *

  
It was around eleven a.m. when Octavia decided to take Anya's advice into consideration. Their conversation actually made her feel a little better. Maybe she needed to confide in Anya more. Maybe Anya knew a lot more about her situation than she thought.

She dialed Raven's contact and held the phone to her ear.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Raven. Are you busy right now?"

"Not at all, is something wrong?"

"No, no. Well, not for long. I need to talk to you about something. Can you stop by my room. Like, right now?"


	7. A Switch Has Been Flicked

  
Raven got there in ten minutes. Octavia doesn't know how, they weren't even staying at the same hotel. But none of that matters, all that matters now are the nine words that are about to come out of her mouth.  _I love you_ , Octavia thought.  _I've loved you for sixteen years._ She opened the door as soon as she heard the knock, anxious to get this over with.

"Hey, is something wrong?"

"Um, can you come in?" Raven does as requested and shuts the door behind her. 

"You seem anxious," the Latina took a seat on the bed. Those brown eyes looked up at Octavia's expectantly, "What's going on?"

"Um, okay. Raven, we've known each other for a long time. Sixteen years, that's a long time. And in that time we've grown.. close. Very close. Do you know what I mean by close?"

"I hope so."

"Okay, good. So, sometimes, um. Sometimes people think they know how they feel about someone. But they don't. Until they do. And usually when they do, it's far too late. Are you still with me?"

Raven nodded, but Octavia could see her gulp.

"You know, one day you look at a person and you see something more than you did the night before. Like a switch has been.."

"Are you quoting X-Files?" Raven laughed. Octavia wanted to roll her eyes, she was trying to be serious and heartfelt.

Octavia sighed. "Maybe, I don't know how to do this. I have a point, I swear I do. The real question is am I ever going to get to it."

"O," Raven cupped her face. "Whatever you need to tell me cannot be that bad." Octavia wanted to cry then and there, she loved this girl so much.

Octavia took a deep breath and sat next to Raven. "Raven.."

The door opened and Monty came flying through with two coffees in one hand and a muffin in the other. When Octavia sent Monty out to go get her some food, she hoped he was going to take the hint and leave the room for a couple hours.

Octavia jumped up from where she was sitting. "Monty, what are you doing here?"

"I brought coffee," he turned to Raven and gave a small wave as if the two actually knew each other.

"Who is that?" Raven asked.

"That's Monty. I've told you about Monty, he's my editor."

"What's he doing here? What, are you working or something?"

"No. Um, he's here to be with me."

"Why?"

"Because he's my friend. My good friend, my best friend these days."

"Oh."

"You've been busy."

"So, all of that. It was about him?"

"All of what?" Monty questioned but no one payed him any mind.

Octavia sees the envious look in Raven's eyes and gets an idea. Is it a smart idea? No. Should she go through with it? No. Will she go through with it? Absolutely.

"Yes," Octavia answered. "Monty and I are.. together. We've been together for the past three months, I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

Raven looked just as surprised as Monty did and gave him a quick once-over. Octavia waited until Raven wasn't looking at her to send Monty a glare that said "if you don't go along with this, I'll cut your head off in your sleep". It's not the first time he's gotten that look.

"Are you two together?" Raven asked for confirmation.

Monty walked over to Octavia and awkwardly placed his hand on her shoulder. "Yes, we are."


End file.
